Buddy & Leo Letters to the Editor

Questions arrive daily for Buddy, Director of Operations, and Leo, Senior Vice President of Napping. While management cannot guarantee useful answers, both are committed to maintaining the highest standards of editorial confusion.


Dear Leo,

I recently sat in a cardboard box and screamed at management for approximately twenty minutes.

Was this the correct course of action?

— Confused in Cincinnati

Leo Replies:
Yes.

Next question.


Dear Buddy,

The cat in our household has knocked three items off a shelf this week and appears completely unapologetic.

What should I do?

— Concerned Dog

Buddy Replies:
Maintain eye contact with management.

Sigh heavily.

Repeat as necessary.


Dear Editor,

Why does the cat object to everything?

— Perplexed Reader

Editor's Note:
We asked.

The cat objected.


Dear Buddy,

My human purchased a new pair of shoes.

Should I monitor them?

— Vigilant Labrador

Buddy Replies:
Absolutely.

New shoes are among the most suspicious objects commonly found in households.

Continuous observation is recommended.


Dear Leo,

I turned the overhead light on and off repeatedly at 3:00 a.m.

My family seemed upset.

Was I wrong?

— Anonymous Orange Cat

Leo Replies:
No.

They were simply insufficiently appreciative of your electrical expertise.


Have a question for Buddy or Leo?

Submit your concerns regarding boxes, shoes, naps, squirrels, household management, unexplained objects, or questionable feline behavior.

Email: [email protected]

Questions selected for publication may be edited for clarity, length, or excessive barking.

Responses may be delayed if the editor is asleep.

Or objecting.

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